Isn’t it amazing how powerful thought is? A thought turns into a word, turns into an action, turns into a way of thinking and then a way of life… Whatever order that happens in our lives begins with our thoughts. If a person thinks they are bad they’ll do bad things. If they think they are unloved, they’ll respond to people as though no one loves them. If they think they have to do everything for themselves they won’t ask for anything. In comparison, when someone thinks they are capable they’ll, with ease, do new things.
Most of the change that has happened in my life has been a change in my thinking. What you believe is your rudder to life. I see some people try to “stand in faith” about something but they’re afraid it won’t happen. Is that faith? It’s interesting that we can believe one thing and react out of another as though we have two conflicting belief systems on the inside. One that SAYS THIS is true and one that has EXPERIENCED that THAT is true.
If a baby cries for food and no one feeds him a belief that “my needs won’t be met” could come or “I don’t matter.” If a person has a critical parent they might develop the belief that “I can’t do anything right” or “no matter what I do it won’t be good enough, I might as well not try.”
This is not to say that parents are always at fault for our negative thoughts. We form our responses to life. My husband and his brother are a perfect example. They are two years apart and grew up very financially challenged. They lived on a street with gang violence, theft and a lot of drugs. My mother in law is a master at stretching a dollar. I don’t know anyone who can find deals and meet needs as skillfully as that lady. She’s amazing. My husband grew up thinking they ate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches every day because it was their favorite food. His brother grew up thinking they ate it because they were poor. What a difference?!
There are many other factors that develop a person’s way of thinking but at some point in life we have to adult a little and own their own thinking.
I’ve believed a lot of lies like these. I believed I didn’t matter. I thought I was destined for failure no matter how hard I tried. I thought I wasn’t good. No matter how much money was in the bank I always stressed about spending. I was afraid I’d overdraw my account, but worse I felt unworthy of the purchase. My first memory of dealing with spending money was when I was eleven. I was getting ready for the sixth grade school year. I don’t think my parents did official back-to-school shopping before then. If they did I just don’t remember it, but that year nothing fit and I needed clothes. My stepdad took me shopping. We weren’t close. It was super awkward. I didn’t feel safe around him. Not because he was violent but because I was insecure and he was critical. So as I tried clothes on I was afraid to say what I did and didn’t like. I didn’t have a sense of style yet at all and everything I bought I regretted. But what really affected me was how worried he was about every penny he had to spend. His opinions and reactions cut deep into my insecure identity. I didn’t know who I was. I didn’t know I was loved. I didn’t know it was a father’s job to provide for me and that it was ok to need it.
I wrestle sometimes with seeing people embrace the lies. It’s so much easier to stay in pain and find ways to live in “just getting by” than it is to dig your way out. The impending doom of a failure keeps so many stuck. If we fail because we haven’t tried, it’s no big deal. But when we pour ourselves into it and fail it can be really painful. How do we get unstuck? How do we get a revelation within us that we ARE stuck? Some don’t even know!!! I ask this in a rhetorical pause so that you… you will ask yourself. As I have asked myself.
As a man thinketh in his heart, so he is… Prov 23:7
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About The Author
Wendy is a stay at home mom of four tiny humans ranging from ages one to nine and the wife of a former U.S. Army Staff Sergeant. In addition to music, Wendy, homeschools, teaches at her kids’ homeschooling co-op, volunteers with a ministry called SOZO that helps people overcome unhealthy habits, hang-ups and addictions and aspires, with her husband, to build a self-sustaining homestead.
She has always filled journals with poetry but nearly moments after learning her first three guitar chords she was writing songs. Her passions are two-fold. Write music that’s relatable and connect with the broken or downtrodden. She just plain loves people.
Having overcome deep brokenness herself she has a heart for those struggling to get out of unhealthy patterns and discover all the greatness that’s hidden underneath. She’s equipped with many power tools that she often shares in her writing but it’s important to know that all power tools need a source of power to function properly. For Wendy that source is God.
Wendy is an acoustic rock singer-songwriter with inspiring lyrics, soothing delivery, and intricate guitar. Her delicate truthfulness is known to hug the soul while articulating even the most difficult of topics. Her music has been called relatable and even healing.