Remember that picture that went around where everyone was arguing if it was gold and white or blue? I mean it’s OBVIOUSLY white and gold! Except my husband is a long time photoshop user and his “expert” opinion is that it’s blue. Yes! This dress right here….
To know and be known… The be fully understood. Seen for who we are… all of who we are.
It’s human nature. I’d argue even, that it’s one of the deep needs of all humankind. To know deeply and be known deeply and in being known deeply also loved completely.
I think it’s one the downfalls of all relationships. We come into relationship with a wall and keep the other from knowing us completely or we are wounded in the relationship and create one. Then, even when we are good on the surface… we have areas that are broken on the inside.
This is the stem of many lies. “What if they find out who I really am?” “I don’t belong here.” “Who do I think I am?” “If they really know me they’ll reject me.”
I’m simplifying. I know.
We filter our circumstances and we see them through the perceptions of the past. That’s how something as simple as “Thank you for doing the dishes,” can yield an angry response such as “You never help. You treat me like I’m a slave” on the inside and a very obvious “go to hell” glance.
No, that is not an exaggeration. It’s one of a million miscommunications my husband and I had. My wall was “self-preservation.” I built it early in life and as my mom was mistreated and taken advantage of by my stepdad I unknowingly vowed to not be treated that way. So when we got married I was pretty clear that we were equals and I wasn’t going to be the maid.
Two years into our marriage and we were still fighting about dishes and ALL of the other cleaning.
This song is about that. It’s about the miscommunications that happen. Cause all he meant to do was show gratitude that I washed the dishes but for me, it emphasized the point that he still wasn’t helping with them. Which felt like blatant disrespect.
Sometimes we have to pause our own reactions to see their point of view. That’s really difficult when we’re living with walls of self-preservation.
On the flip side, we also view the Creator through those filters. Our perceptions can keep us closed off to what he’s actually saying to us.
So this song is about all of that. How our human need plays out in our relationships. I hope you enjoy it!
Comment below and tell me what is the craziest miscommunication you’ve ever had? Or one that taught you something important? I want to hear from YOU!
Here’s my song to you today!
Known (To Know And Be Known)
Written by – Wendy Nichol; Production – Ja’Marc Davis; Acoustic Guitar – Wendy; Lead Vocals & BGV – Wendy; Electric Guitar – Jordan Phillips; Drums – Jesse Sprinkle; Bass – Ryan Creek
She heard goodbye, goodbye
He meant don’t cry, it’s gonna be alright
He knows that he’s fallen from that throne
He wants to be the king of her world
He heard you failed, you failed
She meant I’m proud, no matter what avails
She hopes that she’s the queen of his world
She knows that he depends on every word
The mechanics of a tongue break down
And two loved hearts unspoken
When it comes to deeper things
Walls become our tragedy
Two whole hearts are broken
I heard nothing, nothing
You said I’ve given you everything
I hope that you can see me from your throne
But you’re heart’s aching just to be known
To know and be known, to know and be known
I want to know and be known, I want to know and be known